A recent image captured by NASA’s Curiosity rover – and shared at various paranormal outlets and, of course, on YouTube – shows us an oddly shaped rock in an official NASA photograph of the Martian surface. The more adventurous anomaly hunters among us suggest, however, that the rock is actually a skull, and that the skull may in fact have belonged to an ill-fated Sasquatch.
Now what, you may be asking, would Bigfoot be doing on Mars?
Well, I don’t know. I’m not a Martian Sasquatch expert. Maybe back in the before-times, Sasquatches were a highly intelligent space-faring species, and left Earth for Mars to establish their first colony. Back then, Mars would have been lush and habitable, like Earth is today. But, you know, things happen, and while their Martian colony thrived for a time, a catastrophe of some sort obliterated everything they knew. Maybe an asteroid. They became fossilized, the strange rock here now an ancient relic of when Bigfoot reached for the stars. Only a few remain on Earth, though they’ve long since forgotten their once advanced technologies.
The bigger mystery, in my mind, is the existence of the 2024 independent film Sasquatch Sunset, starring Jesse Eisenberg and Riley Keough. What happened there?
Anyway, when I enhance this NASA image using my patented Stranger Dimensions Image Enhancement Technique (I zoom in a little bit and mess with the contrast), an even more bizarre possibility reveals itself.
This is no skull, nor is it a Sasquatch. It’s another one of those darn Mars Gophers.
